Updated 1 year ago
THIS IS ALL SATIRE, MUCH OF IT IS WRONG, IGNORANT, LAZY AND MEAN-SPIRITED. HUMANS DREAM UP STEREOTYPES TO PUT EACH OTHER DOWN TO MAKE THEMSELVES FEELS BETTER. THIS FUELS GENOCIDES, DICTATORS, AND DANGEROUS POPULISTS LIKE TRUMP; NEVERTHELESS, I HAVE SYSTEMICALLY INCLUDED EVERY LAST VILE CARICATURE I COULD FIND ABOUT EVERYONE.
IF YOU GET EASILY OFFENDED RUN WHILE YOU CAN.
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
“Stereotypes are not harmful for their mere existence; they’re harmful for their reduction of a person or group.”
~Constance Wu
Nationality
Heaven is where the police are British, the cooks are French, the mechanics German, the lovers Italian and it’s all organized by the Swiss.
Hell is where the chefs are British, the mechanics French, the lover’s Swiss, the police German and it’s all organized by the Italians.
Afghanistan – If male, likes little boys and grows poppies and skinning schoolteachers for teaching girls how to read
Albania – major crime, mafia, xenophobic
Algeria – French Arabs, fought for independence, now go go to France to steal
Andorra – Tax evaders, and guns
Angola – Everyone has a machete and has tons of babies
Antigua and Barbuda – Creole
Argentina – “Rich as an Argentine” used to be a saying, disagreeable, megalomaniac, warm and friendly people, can be vain & arrogant, proud, racist, lazy, vain, pedantic, passionate but coarse, noble, honest, kind, carefree, beautiful women, cultured society, disrupting protesters
Armenia – Beautiful Christians massacred by Turks. Play the doudouk. Cher. Zildjan cymbals. System of a Down. Their names all end in “-ian.” Loves Putin and Russia. Hates Muslims.
Australia – Racist and hot women. Looks down on “abos” – “If you hit one, keep driving.” Loves vegemite and “putting shrimp on the barbie.” Americans look at Texans like Texans look at Australians. party animals, nature lovers, surf all day – drink all night, have surfer chicks, heavy binge drinkers, neurotic, extroverted, sometimes shallow but honest, open-minded, free-spirited, love to joke, “hail-fellow-well-met” or “chummy” attitude, men are useless dads, have barbie loving home cooking mums, uncultured, Mad Max, Crocodile Dundee outsider types, sports lovers, meat-eaters, bush battling rednecks.
Abos sit around in a Dream drinking cheap liquor, sucking off the government teat, and play didgeridoos all day.
Austria – impatient, anxious, traditional, wearing ‘Lederhosen’, yodel the whole day to ‘Volksmusik’, polite, efficient service people, but bureaucratic, modest, not superior-minded, old-fashioned, somewhat cosmopolitan, honest, love the little treats in life like ‘Sachertorte’, beer and good wine
Azerbaijan – Software pirates
Bahamas – Tax evaders and boring
Bahrain – Rich
Balkans – Locals embroiled in inexplicable, intractable feuds based on absurd disagreements rooted in the distant past.
Bangladesh – Murder atheists, poor, unconventional, adaptive, open-minded, agreeable, hardworking, politically inactive, intelligent but poorly educated, productive, inoffensive, often corrupt, poor personal hygiene, taking side-steps to get things done, community and family-oriented, working long hours for minimum pay, masculine behavior of men, showing manliness is important, naturally very friendly and hospitable towards foreigners, younger generation well educated
Barbados – All the girls are super hot
Belarus – Russian suckups
Belgium – Music loving, relaxing and generous, eat chocolate and drink beer. Poor personal hygiene, good at mathematics, dishonest in money matters, make bad lovers, hermetically private food-lovers, penchant for building houses and garden sheds, fake ornament decorations, distrust of authority, tax evaders, often run shady side businesses, introverted, modest, impostors, for other nationalities, but sometimes overly patriotic, everyone is a neighbor – but more stupid then oneself, eat only french & fries, except chocolate and other sweet stuff, multi-lingual, everyone’s owns diamonds, “pee where they go”
Belize – Great place to find lost shipments of marijuana and coke along the beach, take the proceeds, and party at a local beachfront bar listening to the police and UB$0 until the well runs dry.
Benin – Bad drivers
Bhutan – “Button” Indian-China mix
Bolivia – Sensitive to being called Latino
Bosnia and Herzegovina – moderate Muslim but basically the same as Serbs
Botswana – Success story, little corruption
Brazil – Hypersexual, fun-loving, hot women, crime, body-centric, party animals, impulsive, incestuous, megalomaniac, most women are super-models, most men are gay or machos, always late, carnivals addicts, soccer and coffee lovers, criminals and robbers, lazy/manana attitude, bean and meat-eaters, beach and sun-worshipers, bikini (called: dental floss here) inventors, active, inventive and constructive people, always trying to outwit government and regulations, impossibly favor-oriented, family- and community-oriented.
Brunei – rich
Bulgaria – Hate the Turks (see Monty Python’s “What have the Romans Ever Done for Us?”) but depended on them for civilization. Survive on tomato, cucumber and goat cheese only, colorful traditions, natural, open-minded, skiers or sun-worshipers, open, warm and kind people, traditional, let bears dance on fire, skilled craftsmen, farmers and artisans, nationalists, “catastrophic” social consciousness, tolerant, feeble religiousness, lack of fanaticism, condescending attitude, curiosity and openness to the “otherness”, anxious, fearful, efficient, accurate, precise, hardworking, disciplined, clever, highly qualified, drama kings and queens, overly suspicious.
Burkina Faso – Illiterate
Burundi – cheerful, understanding and generally reasonable people as are their cousins the Rwandans.
They do have a tendency to gossip about their folks back home and it’s usually about infidelity. They are extremely proud of themselves but not to an extreme as the Amhara or Indians can be.
Cambodia – Temples and the Khmer
Cameroon – hard working, enjoy life, shy
Cayman Islands – secretive, money-oriented, tax evasive, unsavory, hospitable, but introverted
Canada – Maple syrup, Moose, country music, British Irish or French, end everything in “Eh” loves hockey and is nice. They could have had French cuisine, American technology, and British culture. Instead, they ended up with British cuisine, French technology, and American culture.
Aboot, – eh? Submissive, neurotic, agreeable, modest, open-minded, progressive, efficient, straight-forward, polite, respectful, anxious, law-abiding, orderly, caring for handicapped/elderly/minorities, tolerant, multi-lingual, moderate, no hero/celebrity worshiping, don’t like successful people, anti-American, passive, boring, socialist mindset, eat blubber, wear funny hats, live in igloos further north
Central African Republic – Christian and chaotic
Chad – Diverse, Hostile
Chile – Fast-talking, fat, warm, conservative, hardworking, hate everyone around them but love foreigners. Many have probably lost family from the 70s killings by Pinochet. White, like Argentines, but not as racist.
China – Stratified, xenophobic, stingy and noisy spitters, fast-learners, open-minded, ambitious, progressive, efficient, materialistic, do kung fu and other material arts, great at mathematics, can’t hold their liquor, terrible drivers, arrogant, assertive, very “short” somewhere private but “bigger” than Japanese, wear glasses, pirate and copy everything, don’t value contracts, cheap labor, drink green tea, eat everything that lives – even tiger balls, bear gall bladder, rhino horns, and sea cucumber, smoke opium, business-oriented, money rules the world, prepare for world domination. Han master race.
Colombia – Cocaine, coffee obsessed, impulsive, aggressive, violent, kidnappers & narco-traffickers, merengue dancers, passionate, educated, hard-working, caring and listening people, nature lovers
Comoros – Arab, Best for women’s rights
Congo – They think they’re Jamaicans when really they’re the dirt that they walk on. They think they’re the best in Africa but the only thing they’re best as is being the poorest country. Their dicks are big because they can’t achieve anything else so God had to give them at least one useful purpose, for them to exist on the world.
Costa Rica – A paradise. Happy hippy peaceniks with no army.
Croatia – Tall, Nazi-sympathizing, sly, untrustworthy
The man from Zagreb is supposed to be a ‘wannabe’ aristocrat. As with every other denizen of a capital city, they are very stuck up about their centrality and tend to look at everyone else as bumpkins.
Somnolent and Crafty Northern Croatians – sleepy, serene, slippery
Hedonistic East Croatians ‘Slavonians ‘ – partiers, tall tales, eat spivy Kulem sausages and play the Tamuritizia mandolin
Dalmatian Drunkards – ready fighters, burly Popeye fishermen.
Mountain Men of Lika – simple, unsophisticated village bumpkins
Cuba – Communists, poor, stuck up, “The Jews of the Carribean”
Cyprus – basically Greeks who wear tank tops
Czech Republic (Czechia) – The most refined and sophisticated Slavs, which sadly doesn’t say much. Attractive, beautiful and distinctive eyes and noses in a similar way as the Finns, agreeable, heavy beer drinkers, bohemian lifestyle, live and let live attitude, tolerant, “He’s a Czech, he never smiles at people he doesn’t know”, easy-to-get women, introverted, frightened and defensive attitude toward other cultures and the outside world
Côte d’Ivoire – Coffee, civil war, Ebola
DR Congo – They think they’re Jamaicans when really they’re the dirt that they walk on. They think they’re the best in Africa but the only thing they’re best as is being the poorest country. Their dicks are big because they can’t achieve anything else so God had to give them at least one useful purpose, for them to exist on the world.
Denmark – open-minded, somber, introverted, prudish, cold-resistant, decadent hedonists, urban, jovial, untrustworthy, beer-drinking, happy-go-lucky, vaguely unhygienic, profoundly disorganized, sociable and relaxed, easy-going
Djibouti – Kat chewing, thin, extortion, corruption, drugs
Dominican Republic – always late, corruption, hate Haitians
Ecuador – Pineapples, bananas and tropical fruits
Egypt – Funny, nerds, hospital, public sexual harassment, charming and protective of their women
El Salvador – Human trafficking, riot mongering, very innovative when it comes to crime stuffs, Catholics.
Equatorial Guinea – chocolate, corruption, oil
Eritrea – hate Ethiopians, coffee, Italian influence
Estonia – hot women, tech savvy, slow, laconic, estonian cars only run on leasing-contracts.
Eswatini (Swaziland) – Conservative, anti-LGBT/women
Ethiopia – fast runners, Christian, famine
Europe
Finland – Coffee drinking, Nokia, swamps, vodka-lovers, modest, polite, somber, introverted, reserved, honest, curvy straight-talkers, trustworthy, quiet, serious, diligent and humble, tough negotiators and demanding businessmen, nitpickers, melancholic, very tall and blond, they love nature, frugal, calm, sturdy, sauna fans, have attractive women
France – Extramarital affairs, good lovers, best cuisine in the world, chaotic, irresponsible, introverted, selfish, cultured, social “players”, do not like to work – prefer to strike, always surrender in war, don’t speak English, rude to tourists, anti-American, ungrateful, live in a bureaucratic Socialist system, totally dependent on the state, don’t use soap, arrogant and conceited, distant and difficult to meet, don’t respect religious freedom, snobs, God who?
Gabon – rich in resources but people are poor
Gambia – “Awesome place,” home of Kunta Kinte
Georgia – White, Christian, Khachapuri, hate Putin. Like most mountainous countries and regions such as Greece, Switzerland, Punjab, and Afghanistan, the Georgians are firce warriors, and balkanized, The last names offer a window into which part of Ggeorgia they are from. There are most common endings: “shvili” from the eastern Georgia, like Kakheti – that’s where wine comes from. “dze” from another part of Georgia, like Imereti. “ia, va” from Western part, like Megrelia/Abkhazia, known for the best food and beautiful people. “Ani” from Svaneti, mountains of Georgia – super stubborn and violent people. Stalin’s last name was Jughashvili, Stalin is his nickname in Russian. May he burn in hell.”
Germany – “square heads” (very old name shape of their skulls), humorless, liberal, hardworking, engineers, mechanical, organized, boring, conscientious, drink beer all day – beer-bellied, always shake hands, born with a monkey wrench in their hands, eating vast quantities of sausage and sauerkraut, men have dodgy facial hair, women are icy Teutonic beauties with blond hair and blue eyes, legendary bureaucracy, both sexes loathe inefficiency, love the Fatherland, have never been late for anything in their lives, and would secretly like to invade Europe, even if they have to do it via the EU, eat about five huge meals a day, follow blindly rules and regulations like “don’t walk on public lawn” and “before crossing the road, wait for the little green man to show even if there is no car in sight”, pedophiliac
Ghana – everyone is a scammer, in tech, or rich, or is in the chocolate industry
Greece – Smoking, Internet cafes, entrepreneurial, big and overweight, unibrow, lazy, eat souvlaki and olives and drink Ouzo or red wine all day, always break their plates after meals, can’t drive – especially when its dark, disorganized, heavy meat eaters, own all oil-tankers in the world, live the easy life, corrupt, impossible planners, cultured, inefficient, live in “unkempt” buildings with “raggedy curtains”, empty beer cans, kegs or rusted automobiles clutter their yards, have beautiful women, as long they are young – men are mainly homosexual or sexual predators. Stray dogs snoozing amidst busy airport.
Grenada – Reagan land
Guatemala – crime, short, coffee
Guinea – Rich in resources but people are poor
Guyana – Men are drunkards, they eat iguanas and snakes. Pretty women. Jim Jones.
Very deceiving and untrustworthy. You can’t ever trust a Guyanese because he/she is always out for money or citizenship. Most Guyanese desperately want to get out of Guyana and will do anything for a foreign citizenship. Many live illegally in other countries.
Racist; Black and Indian Guyanese hate each other.
Guyana is desperately poor and backward. Modern technology is lacking and infrastructure is dilapidated. Salaries are low, and most people depend on remittances sent from the developed nations. Most educated Guyanese leave the country and work in others. Most skilled Guyanese all left in the 50’s and 60’s.
Most are really skinny because they can’t afford to eat. Especially compared to the rest of the Caribbean.
Suicidal. Guyana has the highest suicide rate in the world. A Guyanese would kill himself over the smallest reason.
Hardworking. Most are so desperate for money they would work hard for it. This is really strange in Caribbean culture.
Deluded. They say Guyana is the best and Guyana is amazing, but the country is dirt poor with a lot of problems and horrible history. The rest of the Caribbean knows this and they aren’t fooling anyone. Most desperately want to leave Guyana, and most Guyanese live outside of Guyana.
Horrible accent.
Most people live in Georgetown. The rest of the country is either endless plains of sugar cane/rice and rain forest full of Amerindians living in mud huts.
Cheap whores.
Haiti – Black, environmental degradations, santeria, death squads, very rich or very poor
Holy See – Pedophiles
Honduras – Murder capital of the world, not sympathetic
Hungary – Goulash, mathematicians, sad, water sports, good drivers, salami addicts, hot cuisine full of pepper and paprika, use oversized pencils, “a small nation struggling and surviving against the odds”, oppressors turned troublemakers, indigenous, often desperate and hopeless, calm and objective way of thinking, courage, audacity and insistence on ideas
Iceland – Can’t drive. EVE Online, Björk, Volcanos, Very cold, Auroras, lots of folk music (Sigur Ros, Solstafir, etc.) geysers, unpronounceable names
India – Apu in Simpsons. Smell like curry. Burn their brides to death for dowery. Shit out in the open. The whole society is planned castes. Unconventional, adaptive, open-minded, agreeable, manipulative, hardworking, politically inactive, studious, intelligent, productive, inoffensive, poor personal hygiene, meditating or walking over fire, pinching needles through their mouth, in hands, legs and other private parts, spiritual, generally poor, snake charmers, legendary bureaucrats, huge families, love to watch soap operas, will outsource the whole world
Indonesia – Fearful, neurotic, extroverted, conscientious, warm and friendly people, lazy, live for today – who cares about tomorrow, no planners, religious, family-oriented, supportive, invented the rubber-time/rarely on time, corrupt, superstitious, slow, inferior, polite, lacking discipline, use feeling not logic, do not follow rules, hypocritical, resistant to change, tolerant, low profile, unwilling to confront or give ‘bad news’, silent in meetings, can’t swim.
Iran – Ayatollah. Aryans. The slave-state Persian Army in 300. They are filthy rich, young teens who have Lamborghinis, have lots of filthy money, and really hate their own traditions. Most Iranians can cite poems. Poetry has been a huge part of Iranian culture.
Authoritarian government, but many Iranians don’t like it.
They brought a huge contribution to Islamic art.
Has a thousand year-old history. Highest rate of legal, government funded sex changes in the world, even beating Thailand, and the highest rate of nose surgery among women. Has problems with Saudi Arabia. Majority are Shia Muslims.
Iraq – Kurdistan up top, Sunni Saddam loving Arabs in the middle, Iran-leaning Shia at the bottom. Muslims who drink beer. Like all Arabs, can’t do military for shit. Everyone hates each other. Men rape men (~30% have been sexually harassed by men)
Ireland – a little druid Paradise, loud, no sense of cuisine, impulsive, glass of whiskey or beer in his/her hand, Celtic music fanatics, have red hair and “white-white” skin, live and sleep with their sheep, religious fanatics and protesters, work in construction, spoiled little shits with booming economy, global corporate headquarters and outsourcing.
Israel – R&D, arrogant, religious, strong family relations, well-traveled, anxious, noisy, rude, curse locals on travels, travel in packs only, ruin things if not satisfied, argue over the price of anything – even a cup of tea for a few cent, don’t respect local people, party all night, take a lot of drugs, if people say something against them, then they are surely Nazis, fancy and fashionable women in tight swimsuits, dream of migrating to other countries if their mother would let them, God help us!
Italy – Northern Italians (Lombards, Gallo-Italics) are hardworking and industrious Germanics. See Germans.
Southern Italians (Italo Romance) are lazy and corrupt.
As a result, Italy is forever fucked government wise.
Good lovers, corruption, free-spirited, good food, emotional, Gigolos, live with their Mamas, even more chaotic than the French, possessive, passionate, pizza/pasta freaks, creative accountants, smooth-talking, manipulative, dishonest, women have mustaches, fashion-addicted, Casanovas, mafia or gang members
Jamaica – Reggae, no hygiene, lazy, grass-smokers, reggae and rasta maniacs, modest, impulsive, loud, boisterous and aggressive, most look like Bob Marley in the morning, strong sense of self and their culture, innovative musicians who influenced many genres, survivors – willing and able to create something from nothing, strong traditional families, caring for others in need, proud God-fearing people, want American women and American dollars, don’t like American blacks, not too smart, the life goal of men is to have plenty of babies with multiple women, like patties, Winston, Stella, Ackee and Saltfish, always late, live in trees, walk barefoot and live generally very primitive, want to migrate someplace else, every man in Kingston owns a gun, Jamaican women go to the Bahamas and the rest of the Caribbean to look for foreign men, all Jamaican men are uncircumcised, all they care are weed, beach, women and rum, God is Bob Marley!
Japan – Perverted, high tech, xenophobic, sushi, ninjas, disciplined, organized, very techy, fearful, neurotic, extroverted, competent, short, wealthy due to being a running dog of the US, workaholics, perverted, bathe in unisex public showers, buy sex toys and porn from vending machines, very “short” somewhere private but “bigger” than Chinese thanks to Ainu infusion, women are subservient to men and make perfect devoted wives, raw-fish eaters, suicidal, arrive in packs. Samurai came from white indigenous Ainu, who were larger, stronger, hairier, and had bigger dicks. Embrace anime and have so many effeminate asexual males because they are a culture that was defeated with the Bomb. See Weebos in Subcultures.
Jordan – Serious, conservative, stubborn, more Bedouin, like hot peppers. Generous, hospitableNaturally grumpy faces.
Kazakhstan – Nomads. Borat. Half Asian half White. Turks who try to be like Russians.
Kenya – Enlightened, Obama, aggressive hawkers
Kiribati
Kurds – Stubborn, overcomplicate things, respectful, compassionate
Kuwait – Rich, Polo Shirts, drive SUVs, always sit at Starbucks wearing shades and staring at other people.
Kyrgyzstan – Oriental communists
Laos – religious, Buddhists, family-oriented, weed smokers, MSG lovers, warm & friendly people, relocated & traumatized refugees, Boat People, farmers, copy the Thai cuisine, eat only sticky rice, wear baggy trousers, hospitable, relaxed, know how to enjoy life, believe in karma and spirits, politically inactive and uninterested
Latin America – All Latin American food is spicy and people like to argue
Latvia – hot women, love potatoes
Lebanon – liberal rich playboys who speak French, high fashion women, smart, hard-working, successful, good looking, pretentious, outspoken, not Arabs but Phoenicians. Great singers and writers.
Lesotho – a poor African’s Canada
Liberia – Ebola, rime, chaos, garbage
Libya – Pirates (archaic) short-tempered, angry
Liechtenstein – rich, full of EU bureaucrats
Lithuania – Last European country to be Christianized, like basketball
Luxembourg – all rich bankers, shady characters with black hats, manipulative, secretive, introverted, live from money laundering and fund managing, hard-working, intelligent, good in mathematics and monetary transactions
Madagascar – Landscape destroyers
Malawi – poor, friendly
Malaysia – lazy, anxious, neurotic, manipulative, survive by cronyism and nepotism, introverted, have inferiority complex, arrogant, have speed traps everywhere, ultra-religious, but sell porn everywhere, inhospitable, hate Westerners, boring, have great varieties of food, embrace multi-culturalism, wear bright, colorful clothes, every long-term visitor is expected to convert to Islam, love to watch soap operas, men chauvinistic, have mistresses, women traditional but with modern thinking
Maldives – international intrigue
Mali – religious extremists
Malta – bad drivers, hard workers, loud & noisy
Mauritania – marijuana, nice
Mauritius – Stray dogs, dirty, crowded
Mexico – Everyone loves the cartels, heavy tequila drinkers, impulsive, wear huge sombreros, religious, family-oriented, neurotic, modest, megalomaniac, men overweight with golden teeth and 3-day-beard, women attractive and easy to get, all women look like Salma Hayek, sneaky, banditos, maids or illegal immigrants, lazy, never finish anything – not even revolution, either sleeping, leaning against a cactus or bored, warm & friendly people, hospitable, great food (enchiladas, tortillas, burritos) and cheap cost-of-living, a real land of the free, mystical cults, human traffickers into the US
Micronesia
Moldova – Drunkard, poor, half Russian
Monaco – 1/3 is millionaires
Mongolia – Horses, live in yurts, drink a lot of vodka, dislike Chinese, bulky, mean faces, aggressive, confrontational, national pride
Montenegro – Lazy and fun to be around and are mostly hedonistic. Former eastern Roman citizens.
Morocco – Couscous, criminals, wants everything gratis, look like Ali Baba, live in an Oasis in the desert surrounded by palm trees, traditional, hospitable, nomads roaming the sands on camels, mysterious, have exotic food, human traffickers into Europe, poor people, lost paradise, polygamists, Casablanca!
Mozambique
Myanmar – VERY short
Namibia – Namibians demand compliments – they will not be taken for granted. Always very polite and politically correct.
Nepal – poor and unemployed, but religious, peace-loving separatists, love colorful clothes, flags and fabrics, illiterate, suppressed and exploited women, tolerant, struggling to survive, anti-Indian, cultured, enlightened
Netherlands – Liberal, tall, polite, open-minded, well-traveled, no commitments, boring, but provoking, organized and efficient, harmless, “a nation of rosy-cheeked farmers who live in windmills, wear clogs, have a garden full of tulips and sit on piles of yellow cheese”, opinionated, can be stubborn and incurably mean, downright devious in business affairs, formidable merchants, “Where a Dutchman has passed, not even the grass grows anymore” a Japanese saying goes, an English pamphlet raged: “A Dutchman is a Lusty, Fat, Two-legged Cheese worm. A Creature that is so addicted to eating butter, drinking fat, and sliding (skating) that all the world knows him for a slippery fellow” – at this time the English language gained a whole array of new insults such as “Dutch courage” (booze-induced bravery), “Dutch comfort” (“Things could be worse”) and “Dutch gold” (alloy resembling gold). Others include: “Double Dutch” (gibberish), “Dutch cap” (contraceptive diaphragm), “Dutch wife”/”Dutch widow” (prostitute, sex doll), “Dutch uncle” (harsh admonisher)
New Zealand – Sheepherders, neurotic, extroverted, strong, unemotional, kiwi-eaters and farmers, provincial, pastoral, lack of sophistication, without any modern cosmopolitan nature, quaint, laid-back, relaxed, productive, opportunity-offering and seeking, multi-racial, tolerant, MacGyver mentality, unconventional, the 3 R’s: “Rugby, Racing & Beer”, independent, unfeminine women, wearing only masculine clothing, disregard intellectuals, farming Frodos, distrust politicians
Nicaragua – They add salt and lime juice to EVERY meal before eating, love corn. Don’t like Costa Ricans. Nicaraguans are alcoholics and beat up their women. Huge families. Women are the best cooks. Hard workers. They fight a lot.
Niger
Nigeria – Flashy dressers, aggressive, neurotic, into black magic and witchcraft, internet scam artists & drug dealers, violent, neurotic, open-minded, modest, manipulative, hard-working, creative, enjoy life, practice bizarre cults, sacrifice their first-born children, corrupt, love money, always horny, women enjoy house management works
North Korea – in death camps, fanatical, primitive, ignorant
North Macedonia – They have this really weird custom where the guy puts his testicles in the vagina of his mate as a sign of… no idea. Scary.
Norway – modest, somber, introverted, trolls, blond-haired, blue-eyed, rational and bored, boring, dependent on welfare state and petroleum, lax rules of sexual morality, institutionalized yearning for nature and simplicity, alcoholics, uneducated, stupid country bumpkin, rural traditions, rustic and unsophisticated fish-eaters, lamentable manners and muddy boots, stunning petroleum wealth
Oman – Oil-rich, talkative and friendly, smells like perfume everywhere
Pakistan – hardworking, politically inactive, studious, intelligent, productive, and inoffensive, low-paid, do dirty jobs, cricket-addicted, anti-Indian, wild-eyed fanatics, militaristic, emotional
Palau
Palestinian Territory, Occupied – More Arab than Syrian or Lebanese. the place where you can brainwash little kids into joining isis Allahu akbar. A wretched little hopeless place full of people no one wants. Act similar to southern Europeans with a mix of pure Arab. Show no fear and are nationalistic
Panama – Panamanians are loud, cheerful and love to party… A bit too much. Panamanians are the only ones that cannot be stereotyped because we’re a mix of cultures from Spanish, Colombians, Arabians, French, Jews, Indians, Chinese, Africa and Italy
Papua New Guinea – Cannibals, Environmentalists, tribal, freedom lovers, honest, friendly, out going, traditional, extrovert. Eat betel nuts.
Paraguay – Superstitious. Hospitable. Paraguayans are very touchy. If you do not get touched, they must hate you! Paraguayans are always drinking terere, and you must never decline if they ask you to drink with them
Peru – everyone rides a llama. People of Peru earn their livelihood by playing panflute in the world’s pedestrian zones
The Philippines – Social media fanatics, “region of natural and man-made disasters”, religious, have large, extended families, neurotic, modest, love to watch soap operas, cars are old patched American jeeps (jeepneys), tricycles are everywhere, chaotic traffic, colorful, kidnapping of foreigners is a favorite past-time – besides cock-fighting, obsession with cellphones and SMS, women call their husbands ‘master’, everyone has at least 3.000 pair of shoes, drama kings and queens, oversea workers sacrifice comfort, endure loneliness and abuse to work abroad to support & satisfy their families neverendingly, exotic foods and fruits, 7.000 exotic islands, warm & smiling people, love Karaoke, cheerful bantering, “Hey, Joe!”, God is Jesus, Mary and the holy trinity!
Poland – Catholics, video games, the butt of so many jokes, neurotic, never smile but complain a lot, hard bargainers, babysitters, intolerant, heavy alcohol users, your car will be stolen once you cross the border, easy-going, conservative, intellectual, attractive women, aggressive men – always up to pick a fight, excellent drivers, hard-working, helpful, listen to folk music, sit in church all day if nothing else to do, very religious
Portugal – ignorant, violent, love buffoonery, kind, rural people with ‘Singer’ sewing machines, bullfighters, meat-eaters, drink port wine, love celebrations, well-traveled hundreds of years ago – now more introverted, always longing for something, but don’t know what, feel lonely, nostalgic, “the past old days were the best”, waiting for the next hero to come, prefer to live a simple life and mocks the powerful
Qatar – Rich. Poor man’s Dubai. Corrupt. Drive poorly.
Romania – Superstitious, gypsies, directly related to Dracula, everyone owns a mystic castle in the Carpate mountains in Transylvania, backwards-oriented, primitive, refuse to work, have too many children, slow, ingenious, trying hard – but never succeed, mistrust police and government, love to celebrate, “women are mothers and wives, trafficking of women, prostitution, domestic violence and sexual harassment is their own fault”, manipulative, nationalists, stable and value-oriented.
-Too weak to maintain their own language in the face of the Romans, unlike the Germans next door.
-Tend to be superstitious paranoid witch hunters
-Too weak to drive out the Hungarians who took their prime real estate smack dab in the middle of their country.
-Basically swarthy Sicilians
Russia – Horse traders, alcoholic, like to follow strong leaders, aggressive, rude, good tippers, big spenders, generally generous, open-minded, agreeable, love their “babushkas” and the last Czar, either spys or communists, alcoholics (primarily Stolichnaya vodka), mainly poor – with a few shiny billionaires, buy football clubs around the world (mainly in England), love ice hockey, gymnastics, wrestling, weight lifting, organized crime (the Russian Mafia) is everywhere, overweight, have deep hearty laughs, threatening nuclear war, want to invade with MIG fighter jets, ultra-orthodox Christians, love to secretly poison their enemies with uranium injections, warmongering similar to Americans
Rwanda – genocide, progressives, rich
Saint Kitts & Nevis – People in St. Kitts are very kind if you don’t act like a snobby tourist and ignore them. When you stop and say hi or wave to them they will help you out!!! The schools are not very good and you have to pay a lot of money to get a very good education. If you are kind to them they will LOVE you
Saint Lucia – backward, littering
Samoa – Paradise that breeds large people, eat a lot, corrupt.
San Marino – Northern Italy, rich. An echo from an era when city-states proliferated across Europe
Sao Tome & Principe – Portugese, safe
Saudi Arabia – crucifixion & oppression. people are usually nice, but not as much as Iranians. Medieval style laws. ruled by a king. Women who got raped will also be punished, even if they are the victims.
Scotland – tightwads, play golf, throw all food all day into one greasy pan, Christian but economically liberal
Senegal – Fast, loud, exuberant, crazy clothes
Serbia – Hot women and genocides. Lazy and fun to be around and are mostly hedonistic. Serbians love yogurt and kebabs made of Muslims
Seychelles – Paradise. Creole. Only place in Africa that isn’t poor
Sierra Leone – polygamists, blood diamonds, Ebol
Singapore – Strict and law-abiding, adaptive, super-efficient, fearful, anxious, crime-averse, rich, selfish, money-oriented, hard-working, clean, stylish, organized, disciplined, tolerant, introverted, career- and certificate-oriented, multi-cultural, love to eat chicken rice, over-regulated, obedient to government and hierarchies, fashionable, against chewing gum and smoking, are ‘kiasu’ – an extreme fear of losing/missing out, “women are materialistic, superficial, high-maintenance, have their heads too high up in the clouds, narcissistic, men are similar, just add boring, egoistic and they live with their parents”, love shopping – love SHOPPING!, the 5 C’s: “Cash, Car, Credit Card, Condominium, Country Club Membership”
Slovakia – No famous people except for possibly Carapathian Andy Warhol? Lazy. Drink a lot of brandy. Make cars. Czechs’ problem children
Slovenia – Very disciplined, honest and rich. Sporty. Jealous, selfish. They love learning foreign languages, they love gossiping, they love sports, welcoming and friendly. Slovenian women are hot and their men are all bald with mustaches. Slovenians complain a lot, are greedy and self-pitiful, but hard-working. Good with languages. If your favorite cow dies in a tragic lawnmower accident, they will be happy that you are less fortunate than them.
Solomon Islands – Domestic abuse
Somalia – Pirates, War, Terrorists
South Africa – Blacks – Corruption, baby rape to prevent AIDS, good with languages
Indians – fraudsters and swindlers, they eat curry, they live in huge houses with the whole extended family.
Whites – “Zef, ” snobbish, classist, live on farms, wear khaki clothes, likes to braai, listens to bad Afrikaans country music, impulsive, racists
All – disease-infested, tribal, poor, community-oriented, strong masculine men, repressed women, proud, love to sing and dance, colorful celebrations, have short lives, live in a dangerous country, suspicious, materialistic, apathetic, regretful, egoistic, pessimistic, revengeful, love TV, enjoy life to the fullest
South Korea – Gamers, Christian. Workaholics, ‘kimchi’ is the only food, open-minded, ambitious, progressive, efficient, materialistic, arrogant, assertive, women are passive, ultra-modern, tech-savvy, love gossip, traditional, women may be viewed by outsiders as having low status, being economically dependent, living in social isolation, and being virtual slaves, but actually, they were never confined to the house, they visit friends, shop, and go to popular theater presentations, women, as they grow older, speak their mind with impunity
Spain – pompous, cocaine loving, lazy, party animals, womanizers, food lovers (Paella), extroverted, untidy, conscientious, impulsive, megalomaniac, bullfighters, always late, “know how to live”, wine-drinking and ham-eating, temperamental, affectionate, look like Antonio Banderas, emotional cry-babies, sophisticated, everybody smokes and talks all the time, proud and patriotic, fashionable, love to dance, relaxed, nationalists, cultured, respect their rights and duties, history and ancestry are important, leisure culture, open-minded and warm people
Sri Lanka – prone to violence, aggressive separatists, lazy, jealous, rebellious, ardent defenders of faith, friendly & warm people, conservative, strong beliefs in cultural norms, extremely traditional, uneducated, unskilled and unemployed, patriarchic and devoted women, believe in “natural evolution of things”, entrepreneurs, sometimes naughty deal makers, opportunist linguists – ‘Neither here nor there’
St Vincent & Grenadines – Rural, bad roads, gossip, friendly, goats.
Sudan – Afraid of dogs. Poor. Beautiful country and friendly people.
Suriname – Lazy, stubborn
Sweden – Liberal, atheist, socialist, attractive, moderate lifestyles, like meatballs IKEA and porn, conscientious, blond-haired, blue-eyed, wealthy, enlightened, rational and bored, boring, dependent on their welfare state, lax rules of sexual morality, institutionalized yearning for nature and simplicity, heavy drinkers, modest, introverted, sophisticated and modern.
“Swedish girls will freely fuck you, but they ultimately always go back and find a Chad to pump out more rabbits with. And they age like, well, all white women do.”
“Swedes are just Germans who got inbred enough to get blonde. And they let Hitler steamroller them in WW2. And deep down, behind all the politically correct multiculturalism, there is a HUGE undercurrent of racism that only recently has bubbled up because they abandoned Lagom in 2015 during the refugee crisis, before dialing back.
They got lucky because they live in a resource-rich vast country that no one else was crazy enough to live and kept breeding like rabbits until they had to go Viking, or a millennia later, migrate to the US where they created communities as gray and lifeless as their native homeland.
Swedes are cowardly smug, stuck up group thinkers who wield their progressiveness passive-aggressively. Sweden is a weird blend of 1984 and Brave New World.
Christianity was the worst thing that ever happened to them.
This Corona response is all of Sweden’s weaknesses and cultural blind spots coming home to roost.
I’m a quarter Swedish.”
Switzerland – rich, decentralized, competent, introverted, modest, anxious, serious, multi-lingual, brand-affine, nitpickers, hard bargainers, watchmakers, sit in the mountains, ‘yodel’ and milk their cows, play 12m long Alpine horns, ruddy-cheeked, pretty smug because of the fresh mountain air, their trains always run on time, their diet is chocolate and holey-cheese, women are mostly blond, never grow old, like to help milking the cattle and are usually called Heidi, live in wooden huts on the mountainside, each room has at least one cuckoo clock, except people in Zurich: those are sharp-suited secretive bankers hoarding Nazi gold and helping out corrupt politicians and gangsters, obsessed with the environment, cleanliness and punctuality, tight on the rules, very private
Syria – Shi’a Muslims – actually they are Alawites, who drink wine, believe in a Trinity of sorts, celebrate Christmas, and believe in reincarnation. Similar to Lebanese, but more humble. Kind. A lot of blondes. Great cooking and desserts. They have a lot of kids, and eat a lot of vegetables, and live on the cheap. Generous, family values.
Taiwan – ambitious, progressive, super-efficient, materialistic, descended from the Kuo Min Tang, the running dogs of the American imperialists who fled to Taiwan in 1949, taking enough priceless national treasures with them to ensure their wealth right up to the present day, tech-savvy, independent, proud
Tajikistan – poor, monobrows
Tanzania – aggressive hawkers
Thailand – impulsive, manipulative, fun-loving (“Sanuk”), conservative, speak/sing a funny language, most women are hot and sexy and work in massage parlous or in bars, men rent out motorbikes or get drunk on Mekong Whiskey on the beach – except ladyboys, nationalists, suspicious towards foreigners, polite, good care-takers, can cook well, greedy, narrow-minded, promiscuous, dishonest, traditional, shy in public, family-oriented, religious, self-confident, independent, intelligent, ignorant, can get very violent and unreasonable very swiftly, can’t pronounce ‘R’, proud and patriotic, superiority-complex, resourceful, street-smart, emotional, Long live the King! (because of the monarchy, it didn’t get colonialized)
East Timor – Portugese, Christian, poor
Tibet – part of China, with temples and mountains and shit and weird class-based Buddhism
Togo – Sunny and hot. Friendly, nightlife
Tonga – Eat butter and drum. Look down on women.
Trinidad and Tobago – “Lime” (party), steelpan drums, laid back, late, bad drivers, terrible customer service, theft party all the time, religious, multicultural, attend everyone else’s celebrations
Tunisia – Beer, Berbers, belly dancing
Turkey – neurotic, conscientious, impulsive, lazy, oppressive, nationalists, intelligent, belly dancers, live from Kebab and Raki, men wear long bended swords in baggy trousers and turbans, have long beards, women wear a headscarf, Fez. Hottest boys, friendly, nice and fun to be around people, accept migrants so well, delicious food and desserts. Bad English. More civilized than everyone around them. Ataturk saved them, and turning away from his legacy will be their downfall.
Turkmenistan – Corrupt
Tuvalu – Will disappear under the water soon. Poor.
Uganda – Alcoholics. The alien/native stereotype which can be summarised as follows: the Great Lakes centralized kingdoms were established by the Bahima Batutsi who came from outside the region – never mind exactly where they came from or why they came -with their long-horned cattle, conquered and imposed what was tantamount to alien rule on the native agricultural communities.
As a result, of this alien intrusion, the cattle corridor of western Uganda has since then been inhabited by two distinct and separate “ethnic entities” – the subordinate “native” Bairu and the dominant, alien ruling Bahima. This alien/native stereotype is based on the assumption that “the Bairu were the original inhabitants of the country.” It is also assumed that centralized states had reached a more advanced stage of social and political development than their “stateless” neighbors had.
Ukraine – Attractive women who flock to rich Westerners. Think a nordic Thailand for non-chomos. Everyone drinks vodka and eats borscht. Basically nordic Viking Russian superhumans, they are all ardent nationalists and vaguely antisemitic.
United Arab Emirates – Nouveau riche. Foreigners outnumbering locals. Show-off. Liberal women. A prosperous land with lots of cool buildings. Lots of foreigners and new rich Arabs who seem to care so much about status.
United Kingdom – Bad teeth, quirky and food. Drinkers, stiff upper-lips, ultra-traditional, steady-on, old chaps, bulldog spirit, bad teeth and hygiene, rude, thin, smoke cigar or pipe, scruffy hair, “fitted” clothing, heavy binge drinkers, swear all day long, artistic, “fashionable”, deep thinkers, intelligent and articulate, boastful, anti-American, ride bikes, God save the Queen!
UNITED STATES
United States – friendly, loud, generous, tolerant, fat, arrogant, impatient, open-minded, ambitious, straightforward, practical, uneducated, ignorant about the outside world, racist, tasteless, horrible dressers, Jesus obsessed gun nuts who like fast food and war.
Uruguay – tango and soccer. Often high.
Uzbekistan – Peaceful, quiet, laid back, Muslims, women love wearing lots of accessories, traditional. Uzbeks eat with their hands while sitting on the floor.
Venezuela – Hungry. Boxing. Venezuelan women are promiscuous and have STDs.
Vietnam – French culture, modest, mystical, obscure, wear funny hats and sleep in rice fields, eat baguette and strawberry jam or pate, hard-working, friendly, helpful
Yemen – Dead. Everything they had they stole from Somalia and Somali people, unoriginal people. Anti-female and Anti-gay terrorists who drink coffee
Zambia – Zambians are the most peaceful Africans
Zimbabwe – Fucked up their farms by killing whitey, selling tractors for scrap and generally letting everything go to shit. Proof that only the white man can solve Africa’s problems.
